Every bubble bursts

Ritz Plaza

Room No: 263

I opened the teak finish wooden door of Room No: 263 and held it open for her to walk in. She softly brushed past my body and I slowly followed her in, locking the door from inside. The room was small but bore an expensive look with the white satin bed cover, matching pillow covers and embroidered curtains. As I walked in, I looked around the room. A wooden cot, a wardrobe with mirror, a coffee table and two chairs were the only furniture in the room.

“Worth Rs 1600“, I thought, recollecting the advance I payed to the fat feminine guy at the counter. I had thoughtfully ignored his inquiring glance when I signed the check-in register.

I stood at the doorway admiring the worthiness of the money I spent and completely forgetting the presence of another person in the room. She was comfortably seated on the bed with her hand resting on her bag. I looked at her and realized how beautiful she looked in the peacock blue salwar and light blue shawl. I remember the day when she wore it for the first time. It was on her 21st birthday and her father had gifted this dress to her. That was two years ago and she still looked the same- cute and beautiful. She is Sruthi, my landlord’s daughter.

I couldn’t believe that I was with Sruthi in a hotel room and that too in her home city. It was just one hour before when I got a call from her. I was in the office preparing for a client presentation. She said she wanted to spent some time with me in the evening and I readily obliged because she never had the habit of making such wishes. I made up some reasons and left the office to meet her. She was waiting for me at the bus stop near my office and in fifteen minutes I picked her up from there.

She was unusually silent when she sat next to me in the car. I asked her whether she had some plans for the evening. She shook her head and said that she had left her home in the afternoon saying that she was going back to her hostel. She was doing her Post Graduation in a college which was 100 Kms from here. Since it was already getting dark, there was no chance of her travelling 100 Kms at this time. That was it. She wanted to spend the night with me and I have to make arrangements now. I cannot take her to my place because I was living on the 1st floor of her own house.

Lesson: Don’t fall in love with your land lord’s daughter because you won’t have your own space to spent time with her. I always learn things in the hard way.

I had to find a place stay… a safe place to take her with me. I called a friend to ask his opinion and made up some stories saying that my friend and family are visiting the city and I have to arrange for their stay. He suggested to check in at Ritz Plaza which is beyond the city limits and on the way to the beach. I thanked him and thanked myself for calling the right guy.

It was drizzling as I drove in to the parking lot of Ritz Plaza. I went straight to the fat feminine guy at the counter and motioned Sruthi to occupy the vacant couch at the lobby. I paid the advance, signed the register and silently cursed the rules for making me enter my full name and address for checking in. The front office guy looked straight at my face as he gave the key to Room No: 263.

“Rahul, where are you?” Sruthi quizzed. I was awakened from my thoughts and Sruthi was standing near me.

“Oh yeah. I was just thinking” I answered.

“Thinking about what?” She asked.

“Why did you cancel your trip today?” I asked eventhough I knew what her answer was. But I wanted to hear from her.

“I wanted to spend some time with you and to talk to you” She answered.

“Ok. But why so urgent?” I enquired just to make her lose temper.

“Why? Did I disturb you?” She asked and made a face.

“No, No. But see where we ended up….. in a hotel room” I said mocking displeasure in my voice.

She remained silent.

We had our rare intimate moments together in her house when her parents were not around. I used to take leave from office on those days during her vacation when her parents were not in the house. So being together was not a new thing for us. But that was in the safety of her own house unlike this hotel room. And I need to confess that this was my first experience staying in a hotel with a girl.

My last question had an inverse effect on her and she remained silent for another couple of minutes. I went towards her and sat beside her on the bed. I put my hands around her and gently pulled her towards me. She rested her head on my shoulder as I kissed on her forehead. I looked at her and saw her eyes gleaming. Did I see a tear drop…???? No… I guess!

“Do you love me?” She asked.

“Yes my dear. I love you” I said and kissed her quivering lips.

She clung to me as we descended on the bed and made love.

It was after midnight when I came back to my senses. She was lying on my arms and I had a bad cramp due to her weight. I tried to pull my hand without disturbing her but in vain. My action woke her up and she crawled away from me. I got up from the bed and went to the bath room and had a warm shower. When I came back she was sitting on the bed crossed legged and motioned me to sit beside her. I obeyed her like a child. She pulled me towards her and I rested my head on her lap. She had done this before….. whenever she had to discuss something serious. So I was all ears for her.

“You know Vinod?” She asked.

“Who?” I enquired.

“Vinod….Sankar uncle’s son who is a Scientist in ISRO. You have seen him when they visited our home, right?” She asked.

“Yeah. Whats with Vinod?” I quizzed.

Silence followed. And after a couple of minutes she said

“My parents have fixed my marriage with Vinod”

“What?????” I sprang up from her lap and shouted. “You never told me….”

“I had told you that something is fishy…..when they came to visit us last week. It wasn’t a usual visit. I had smelled a rat and had informed you. After that visit my parents were explaining to me a lot about that guy as if I don’t know him. They even asked me whether I like him or not” She explained.

“And remember what you said….. you said that it was just my feeling and there was nothing wrong????” She continued.

“Yeah. But how did it all happen so suddenly?” I quizzed.

“My parents went to Sankar uncle’s place today morning and came back with this happy news” She said sarcastically.

“Vinod has to go for an official trip to Turkey and they wanted this marriage to happen before that” She continued.

I was hell shocked and was walking up and down in the room. I was devastated. I never knew I would have to face this so soon

“You want me to talk to your parents??” I asked.

“Its so late. My father have already given a word and he wont differ. Only way left is to elope with you. Which I cannot do since I don’t’ want to my parents to be unhappy and suffer because of me.” She said.

“What about me? What about our happiness? Will you be happy without me?” I shouted.

“You will forget me soon. Same might be the case with me as well” She said.

“But…” She cut me short.

“Anyway you never wanted any commitments, right? You always wanted to be a free bird and now why are you reacting like this?” She questioned.

“But I love you and I was feeling so complete with you……” I tried to explain.

“Lets not talk about it Rahul. Its Over and I wanted to let you know” She said.

There was a long stint of silence before I talked conveying a false sense of guilt.

“Why didn’t you tell me this when we met today? You should have told this when we came in to this hotel at least”

“No. I wanted you today and I realize that I wont have you anymore. I wanted all the happiness together and wanted you to experience that too. I wanted our relationship to be complete lest I regret in the future” She explained.

The conversation came to a dead end. There was no more questions and explanations. It was like everything came to a stand still.

I looked at my watch. It was 5:30 in the morning. I got up from the bed and dressed up and she followed. We vacated the room and got in to the car.

“Where should I drop you?” I asked.

“In the bus station. I am going back to college” She said.

I didn’t reply.

After a brief silence I asked “When is your wedding?”

“End of this month” She said.

So soon….. I thought. So these are the last few moments. In five minutes she will be on her way and I wont get another chance to call her back. I was feeling the pangs of losing my love. But my inner self was forcing me to remain silent and I obliged.

“Dad will personally invite you and you should be there to bless me” She laughed sardonically. But I ignored her sarcasm.

Soon we reached the bus stand and I stopped the car. As she got out of the car I asked

“Where is the venue of your marriage function?”

“Oh Sorry. I forgot to tell you. Its in the banquet hall of the same hotel Ritz plaza” She smiled and walked towards the bus station.

Love is a mirror

"When you fall in love, you fall for a mirror of your own most present needs" – Deepak Chopra

Nin mukham..... oru orma kurippu

A very old poem..... just a fond remembrance!!!!

Ennum ennum ente kinaavil
odi ethunnu nin mukham

thazhuki ozhuki aa thaazhvarayil
ninte maathram pon mukham

unarenda aa kinaavil ninnum enne
unarthalle madhura swapnathil ninnum

sundaramaam aa thaazhvarayil
ente nizhalaayi nee ninnu

sundariyaam nee enne
karavalayathil pothinju

ente praananaayi nee
aathmaavil kudiyirunnu

ennum ennum ente kinaavil
odi ethunnu nin mukham

thazhuki ozhuki aa thaazhvarayil
ninte maathram pon mukham...!

A conflicting hypothesis

The red ornate meat at the left side of my body is pounding heavily. I could feel the throb and the tireless flow of hot fluid......... doctors term it as hypertension. Quite strange..... hypertension at this age... very uncommon!!!!!

I have felt this throbbing before, when I was with my love..... long back in school. That was a delight... a feeling of joy but now....this is disturbing.

Wish everything is back to normal and that the throbbing happens only for love and not by any somatic disorders!!!!!

It was raining

It was raining.....

I waited for you and you never came

It was raining.....

I saw you in his arms and you tickled my bane

It was raining.....

I saw you with your child playing in the rain

It was raining.....

I saw you weeping at the end of the nuptial game

It was raining.....

You came to me and I was vexed about defame

It was raining.....

You talked to me but I was not the same

It was raining.....

You walked away and I lolled my head in shame

It was raining....

I cried and my tears were washed away by the rain

It was raining and its still raining!!!!

Dream Castles built on sand

Today the sea was so agitated. The waves were rising high and smashing against the shore. Darkness was creeping in steadily and the sunset was sporadically veiled by the dark clouds. The beach was almost empty except for a few sea side vendors who were packing their goods and cursing the weather for marring their business. A couple of kids were busily building sand castles using the wet sand that was watered by the high waves. The Girl was standing at the far end of the beach watching the waves and mulling over the similarity between the both- the agitated sea and her demented mind.

She knew that this was the day. The day when all her dreams will be shattered. She stood there waiting for the Boy to come. He had called her earlier today and asked her to come to this place. He sounded so formal and she read the undercurrents in his words.

They used to meet at this place regularly but this was her first trip to the beach alone. Her mind was disturbed like never before. Her thoughts shifted from the agitated sea to her quondam meetings with the boy. She remembered how she used to lie on his shoulder, holding his hand and listening to all that he had to say. But now she felt so lonely and tried to divert her mind from those thoughts. But she failed miserably.....

She was so immersed in her thoughts that she did not realize the presence of the boy near her. He stood there with out disturbing her and thinking of his mission to meet her. He had come here to meet her for the last time and to bid good bye.

The strong western wind was erratically playing with her hair and the dupatta. He moved closer to her and combed her hair with his hand, lining it to the back of her ear. She was suddenly wakened from her disturbing thoughts and took a step back. There remained an uncomfortable silence in the air. She looked at him with obscured feelings waiting for him to start the conversation. It was a strange feeling since they have not remained silent like this......... not even once..... as far as she could remember. But now.... a word has become precious like an oasis in the desert.

The silence grew with the darkness and it had become unctuously unendurable. But she sincerely wished this to continue because this silence was less painful than parting.

But his mind was engrossed in different thoughts. He wanted to end this excruciating silence. He put his hands on her shoulder and whispered to her "Sorry dear..... Good bye!!!!". She felt as if she was struck by a bolt and stood there completely shocked and immoveable. Without waiting for a reply he walked past her. She stood there following his trail with her moist eyes. She wished that he will stop and will come running back to her. But he continued to walk.... without thinking of the meaningless words that he uttered. On his way, he deliberately stamped on the sand castle build by the kids, destroying it completely.... exactly the way he ruined her dream castle that was pillared with her love......!!!!!

The Silent Witness

On a cold morning, 'Girl' wished to go for a long drive with 'Boy'. She liked such trips with boy and he had always obliged to her wishes. Their love had blossomed during such long drives. They always took the same road and that road was so special to both of them. There was a lone badam tree by the side of the road and Girl had developed some special attachment to the tree. She used to keep gazing at the tree when ever they passed by. That day she felt so special and remained silent during their drive down the deserted road.

Boy: (on a sleepy mode) What happened dear? Why are you so silent?
Girl: (turned towards him but remained silent)
Boy: (smiling) I think you had a bad night's sleep yesterday.... Were you dreaming about me??? he he!!
Girl: (still remained silent but smiled)

The badam tree was in sight at a distance and she kept her eyes on that. Boy looked at her and followed her gaze to the tree.

Girl: (keeping her eyes on the tree and like waking up from a dream) Have you ever noted that tree dear?
Boy: (as if he haven't seen that tree at all) Which tree?
Girl: Nothing
Boy: Oh... ok... that badam.... yeah... i have seen it. why? Whats it with the tree?
Girl: (remained silent)

She was in a dream land. She dreamt that they were standing below the tree holding each other on a tight hug. She felt as if she was on top of the world when she cuddled in his arms in this cold morning. Suddenly her dream was broken when the car came to a sudden halt. She opened her eyes and saw that boy had stopped the car right near the badam tree. Boy jumped out of the car and came to her side. He gently pulled her out of the car and led her to the tree. The cold morning breeze danced through her hair and made her more beautiful. He pulled her towards him and hugged her the way she wished. She forgot the surroundings and settled in his arms not letting this moment to slip away. She was so happy.... so contented..... she looked in his eyes with unexplainable emotions and kissed him. That was the best moment in their lifes.

The badam tree looked at them happily and wished them the best.

She held his hand tightly on their way back home. She was so surprised how her wish was granted. When she got down at her home, she went to him and whispered..... "I love you"!!!!!!!!

Years later, the boy was driving down the same road with his wife. He saw the same badam tree but now with the company of some bushes that sprouted out after the rain. The sight of the tree brought in him flashes of memories of his past. He looked at his wife. She was sleeping after the long and bitter argument they had previous night. He brought the car to a halt near the tree. His wife woke up and stared at him. He asked her to get down and she obeyed but with some dubiety. Soon as she reached under the shades of the tree, he pulled her towards him and hugged her. She was shocked and pushed him away angrily.

Wife: (shouting angrily) What the hell are doing? Are you mad?
Boy: (remained silent but staring straight at her)
Wife: You think that you are still a teenager. But you are not. This is a public place man and what an ambience to show love.... uhh!!!!!!!
(And she quickly got back in to the car)

Leaning on the tree he stood there for some time. Drained of all thoughts he got back in to the car and turned on the ignition. He gently looked at the tree and with a vacuous mind he drove away....!!!

The tree stood there with teary eyes and waved him good bye.... and waited for another spring to come driving by.......!!!!!

Doctored relationships

What does relationship mean?? It is a state of connectedness between people especially an emotional connection.  Being a social animal, we all have relationships. But to what extend are we emotionally involved.... say in a friendly relationship, in a love relationship, or in parental relationship etc.....? The point to ponder is the word "emotional".

We all use the word "affair" to depict a "love affair". The actual meaning of affair is- an intense amorous relationship, usually of short duration- A romantic and sexual relationship between two people who are not married to each other. But we all proclaim that somebody or even ourselves is having an affair. Do we really mean it that way? Or is it just that we are following the language that we are used to.

But in the recent times, relationships especially friendship and love have taken a slue towards the right meaning of the term "affair"....not to mention the emotional quotient. Relationships have been manipulated and doctored in all possible ways. Even a ten year old have started approaching the opposite sex just for the "affair" factor. Just imagine the plight of things when he/she grows up.

Lets not act as if we are not prone to it. It definitely includes you and me and it emphatically affects us. It definitely requires our sincere effort and ageless struggle towards building a better place to live.

Lets pray for a better place to live..... a place where each of us are emotionally attached to each other... Lets pray that we are filled and repleted with moral values and flavours of unfeigned love and care...... Lets pray........ !!!

My Favorite Quotes From The Book Eleven Minutes By Paulo Coelho

My Favorite Quotes From The Book Eleven Minutes By Paulo Coelho

• "At every moment of our lives, we all have one foot in a fairy tale and the other in the abyss."


• "While she was waiting for her Prince Charming to appear, all she could do was dream."


• "She had to content herself with loving and suffering in silence until the end."


• "When we meet someone and fall in love, we have a sense that the whole universe is on our side.  And yet if something goes wrong, there is nothing left!  How is it possible for the beauty that was there only minutes before to vanish so quickly?  Life moves very fast.  It rushes from heaven to hell in a matter of seconds."


• "...but something always went wrong, and the relationship would end precisely at the moment when she was sure that this was the person with whom she wanted to spend the rest of her life.  After a long time, she came to the conclusion that men brought only pain, frustration, suffering and a sense of time dragging."


• "I can choose either to be a victim of the world or an adventurer in search of treasure.  It's all a question of how I view my life."


• "(Don't) listen to the malicious comments of those friends who, never taking any risks themselves, can only see other people's failures."


• "If I can walk on my own, I can go wherever I like."


• "Life always waits for some crisis to occur before revealing itself at its most brilliant."


• "Despite her apparent freedom, her life consisted of endless hours spent waiting for a miracle, for true love, for an adventure with the same romantic ending she had seen in films and read about in books.  A writer once said that it is not time that changes a man, nor knowledge; the only thing that can change someone's mind is love.  What nonsense!  The person who wrote that clearly knew only one side of the coin.  Love was undoubtedly one of the things capable of changing a person's whole life, from one moment to the next.  But there was the other side of the coin, the second thing that could make a human being take a totally different course from the one he or she had planned; and that was called despair.  Yes, perhaps love really could transform someone, but despair did the job more quickly."


• "Beauty changes as swiftly as the wind."


• "Humans can withstand a week without water, two weeks without food, many years of homelessness, but not loneliness.  It is the worst of all tortures, the worst of all sufferings."


• "In love, no one can harm anyone else; we are each of us responsible for our own feeling and cannot blame someone else for what we feel."


• "As if everything had been ordained by fate, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, as if she had known this man all her life or had already lived this moment in dreams and now knew what to do in reality..."


• "That's my one great virtue: I refuse to deceive myself of you.  Because it's not worth it, because you don't merit a lie."


• "If he was the man she wanted him to be, he would not be intimidated by her silence."


• "Considering the way the world is, one happy day is almost a miracle."


• "...but he should understand my insecurities, because I'm a woman, I'm fragile, and when I'm in that place, I'm a different person."


• "Love is not to be found in someone else, but in ourselves; we simply awaken it.  But in order to do that, we need the other person.  The universe only makes sense when we have someone to share our feelings with."


• "I've learned that waiting is the most difficult bit, and I want to get used to the feeling, knowing that you're with me, even when you're not by my side."


• "Profound desire, true desire is the desire to be close to someone.  >From that point onwards, things change, the man and the woman come into play, but what happens before--the attraction that brought them together--is impossible to explain.  It is untouched desire in its purest state.  When desire is still in this pure state, the man and the woman fall in love with life, they live each moment reverently, consciously, always ready to celebrate the next blessing.  When people feel like this, they are not in a hurry, they do not precipitate events with unthinking actions.  They know that the inevitable will happen, that what is real always finds a way of revealing itself.  When the moment comes, they do not hesitate, they do not miss an opportunity, they do not let slip a single magic moment, because they respect the importance of each second."


• "Now that she had nothing to lose, she was free."


• "And that was now her great joy: to say to reality that she didn't need it, that she was not longer dependent on what happened in order to be happy."


• "Now she was searching once more for her reason for living, or, rather, for the kind of utter surrender by which a person offers his or her heart and asks for nothing in return."


• "Anyone who is observant, who discovers the person they have always dreamed of, knows that sexual energy comes into play before sex even takes place.  The greatest pleasure isn't sex, but the passion with which it is practiced.  When the passion is intense, then sex joins in to complete the dance, but it is never the principal aim."


• "Anyone who is in love is making love the whole time, even when they're not.  When two bodies meet, it is just the cup overflowing.  They can stay together for hours, even days.  They begin the dance one day and finish it the next, or--such is the pleasure they experience--they may never finish it.  No eleven minutes for them."


• "Every human being experiences his or her own desire; it is part of our personal treasure and, although, as an emotion, it can drive people away, generally speaking, it brings those who are important to us closer.  It is an emotion chosen by my soul, and it is so intense that it can infect everything and everyone around me.  Each day I choose the truth by which I try to live.  I try to be practical, efficient, professional.  But I would like to be able always to choose desire as my compassion.  Not out of obligation, not to lesson my loneliness, but because it is good.  Yes, very good."


• "The strongest love is the love that can demonstrate its fragility.  Anyway, if my love is real (and not just a way of distracting myself, deceiving myself, and passing the time that never seems to pass in this city), freedom will conquer jealousy and any pain it causes me, since pain is also part of the natural process.  Anyone who practices sport know of this: if you want to achieve your objectives, you have to be prepared for a daily dose of pain or discomfort.  At first, it's unpleasant and de motivating, but in time you'll come to realize that it's part of the process of feeling good, and the moment arrives when, if you don't feel pain, you have a sense that the exercises aren't having the desired effect."


• "If you love another person, you don't depend on the sex act in order to feel good."


• "The world enjoys suffering and pain.  There's sadism in the way we look at these things, and masochism in our conclusion that we don't need to know all this in order to be happy, and yet we watch other people's tragedies and sometimes suffer along with them."


• "As I say, it's the human condition.  Ever since we were expelled from paradise, we have either been suffering, making other people suffer or watching the suffering of others.  It's beyond our control."


• "Why was it that in God's holy world men were only interested in showing her pain.  Sacred pain, pain with pleasure, pain with explanations or without, but always pain, pain, pain..."


• "'I felt that pain is a woman's friend.'  'That is the danger.'  'I also felt that pain has it's limits.'  'That is the salvation.  Don't forget that.'"


• "That's why I'm telling you: don't get used to it, because it's very easy to become habituated; it's a very powerful drug.  It's in our daily lives, in our hidden suffering, in the sacrifices we make, blaming love for the destruction of our dreams.  Pain is frightening when it shows its real face, but it's seductive when it comes disguised as sacrifice or self-denial.  Or cowardice.  However much we may reject it, we human being always find a way of being with pain, of flirting with it and making it part of our lives."


• "Pain and suffering are used to justify the only thing that should bring only joy: love."


• "I need to love--that's all, I need to love.  Life is too short, or too long, for me to allow myself the luxury of living it so badly."


• "Original sin was not the apple that Eve ate, it was her belief that Adam needed to share precisely the thing she had tasted.  Eve was afraid to follow her path without someone to help her, and so she wanted to share what she was feeling.  Certain things cannot be shared.  Nor can we be afraid of the oceans into which we plunge of our own free will; fear cramps everyone's style.  Man goes through hell in order to understand this.  Love one another, but let's not try to possess one another."


• "Always making plans for the future, and always being surprised by the present."


• "In all the languages in the world, there is the same proverb: 'What the eyes don't see, the heart doesn't grieve over.'  Well, I say that there isn't an ounce of truth in it.  The further off they are, the closer to the heart are all those feelings that we try to repress and forget.  If we're in exile, we want to store away every tiny memory of our roots.  If we're far from the person we love, everyone we pass in the street reminds us of them."


• "The only thing she could do now was to shed a few tears, feeling rather afraid of herself, an intelligent young woman, who had everything going for her, but who tended to make wrong decisions.  She just hoped that this time she was right."


• "She made this promise because she knew love's traps all too well, and knew how easily they can change a woman's mind."

Nice quotes

“I laugh, I love, I hope, I try, I hurt, I need, I fear, I cry. And I know you do the same things too, So we're really not that different, me and you.”

“And if it all falls apart, I will know deep in my heart, the only dream that mattered had come true. In this life, I was loved by you.”

by Colin Raye


“I must learn to love the fool in me the one who feels too much, talks too much, takes too many chances, wins sometimes and loses often, lacks self-control, loves and hates, hurts and gets hurt, promises and breaks promises, laughs and cries”

by Theodore Isaac Rubin

“I miss you when something really good happens, because you are the one I want to share it with. I miss you when something is troubling me, because you are the one who understands me so well. I miss you when I laugh and cry because i know that you are the one that makes my laughter grow and my tears disappear. I miss you all the time, but I miss you most when i lay awake at night and think of all the wonderful times we spent with eachother;for those were some of the best times of my life.”

“Love is when you shed a tear and still want him, it's when he ignores you and you still love him, it's when he loves another girl but you still smile and say I'm happy for you, when all you really do is cry.”

Nine minutes

I felt like in heaven, when you were near me,
your hand over mine and legs across mine....
I took you in my arms and you never said no,
you gave me your lips and I kissed it with love....
I held your hips and pulled you towards me,
I felt your heart beats beating against mine,
I felt the warmth of your breath and
your breast never tried to be free from me....
The taste of your ears became mine,
your hair tangled with my beard and chest....
and it seemed you were counting my heart beats....
It was not long when that moment came,
with a heavenly jerk I was deep inside you......
measuring the unfathomable depth of your juciy inside..
and before I could say I love you,
it was all over and I was resting
on your beautiful self
counting your innumerable sighs........!!!!!!

Love

As we grow up

I was browsing through some of the e-cards in the net and I bumped upon this one.....It was a colourful card with lots of floral designs. But it was the words that struck a chord somewhere in my mind.... Here it is... just for you........enjoy!!!!
 
"As we grow up, we learn that even the one person who wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back. Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin....."

Packets of love .. sent from Above

I was born in a middle class family. Both my parents were government employees and being the youngest child of the family I grew up as a spoiled brat. I was sent to the best school in the locality though it burnt my dad's pocket to a great extent. But he was so keen that I get the best education available. Though late, most of my wishes were granted and I was brought up in the best possible way.

My childhood days were mostly spent with my mother and my elder sister. Dad, being an Army Officer, was posted in different regions of this vast country and he used to come home on a one month vacation, once every year. I dont know whether I enjoyed his presence during those visits except for the gifts that he used to bring (once he even gifted me a Nike sports shoe which I used to wear with pride because it was a rare thing in my locality). I was always worried about his yearly visits because I thought it as a threat to my freedom. It was during the early years of my teenage that he retired from service and came home permanently and I presumed it as the end of my independence.

Dad and mom tried to groom me as a responsible and independent individual. I was asked to travel alone to different places so that I will learn from my experiences, solve problems on my own and be successful with out much help. I adhered to their policies till I finished my schooling and left for higher studies.

During my fortnightly visits, I started acting like a guest in my own home. I started to shy away from responsibilities and my interaction with my parents started decreasing. The time at home was spent either watching TV or browsing the net. They complained but I turned a deaf ear to their cries. Later on when I got a job and shifted to cochin, the same scenario continued. I wished to be the way they wanted me to be but I always failed to live up to their expectations.

Now at 26, my mindset has completely undergone a transformation..... I sincerely want to live for them. I want to give them all the happiness in the world. I realize that with out them it would be very hard for me to exist. I am afraid to think about a time when they are no longer there and I am alone......

One day when I woke up, I saw my dad standing inside my room. He was opening my cupboard and keeping something inside. I got annoyed and my first instinct was to shout at him. But I cut short my temper and gently asked him what he was up to. He said that he has kept his insurance papers inside my cupboard and that I may never know when it may come handy. Without much explanation, he walked out of my room and the salty liquid blinded my vision..........

I wish I could start my life all over again..... just to love them to the fullest and to make them happy just the way they fulfilled my life..........!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Angel of my dreams

This is an impressive poem. I liked the lines so much that I thought of sharing it with you......

Angel of my dreams

Krishna Kumar

Once I had a dream, and an angel came through
All I could see, appeared so real, so true
She held my hands and took me around
I was lost, I was bound

I could feel her and so could I touch
She made me feel so good, so could she comfort
Holding hands on the beach
Talking under the moon whole night
Kissing and holding each other tight

Her voice would mesmerize
her words would summarize
the world of love, the horizon of togetherness
and I thought, this world would never capsize

Then there was a jolt and I woke up
I stretched my hands, searched and tried
she was not there and I was alone
gone was the dream and so was she

I could not accept I could not realize
She was gone and so was the dream
I cried and so did I scream
I wanted her, I wanted the dream
But thats not the fate, thats not destiny

For no matter the distance
Or the obstacles for instance
I will always belong to her
For we are meant for each other
not in reality, but at least in our Dreams

Then I think this is not the last time I am sleeping
This is not the last time I am dreaming
I will still sleep, I will still dream
I will still love, I will still gleam
No matter I loose, No matter I gain
I want to sleep & want to dream again

Thank you

It was another black eyed day.... a bad ending of a beautiful fairy tale.... and the prince and the princess got separated and they never lived together happily thereafter......
 
It had just a bubble's life.... but in the short span it taught me to be simple, loving, caring,  dewy-eyed and credulous (positively).....

Thank you for the 90 days of happiness...... and you made me a better human being.....!!!!!

The Bohemian Rhapsody....!

The Bohemian Rhapsody....!

I have realized that my words are obsolete...... my thoughts rusty....my emotions abstract.....and every thing about me is archaic.....

I decided to look at my life with a different perspective.... I looked in to the mirror to see what adorns it.....I felt as if I have turned blind.....I couldnt see anything.... not even a vague reflection....not even a silhouette.....just dark greyish smoke......thick suffocating smoke...........

I felt a pain in my back....I could feel the flow of hot blood....it was running down the back of my legs.... I looked down.... saw a pool of blood around me.....I turned around to get a glimpse of the friend who did it to me.....nobody was there....I looked again....this time more carefully.....through the smoke I could see familiar faces....happy faces.....faces of people whom I know.....my parents, my family, my friends, my acquaintances............

the rhapsody continues..........

The coveter....!!!!!!

You came in to my lush green garden
with infinite variety of seasons
the herbs and the child lawn
greeted you with smile so beloved.

My thoughts are still rusting
wondering what made you mine
can we ever pledge what knot-
the lawn and the dew drop sense.

Yonder, I say to my dear rose
in the far western horizon we meet
not this day, not tomorrow
at the end of this act so beautifully played.

A role so venomous I play
venomous to the holder and the beholder
treachery in all its vigour
would perish only with my last breath................!!!!!!!!

Cupids arrow

Cupid has struck me right in my heart
and my heart is no longer mine
oh my rabbit, you have conquered all my senses
and my senses longed to make you mine.

Her face, round as a lunar replica
her teeth shined like pure diamonds
her lips are like rose petals
and her silky hair danced in rhythm with the breeze................

The belly dancer.

Dedicated...............

To the belly dancer, who have never done a belly dance in public........
to the belly dancer, who taught me to love.........
to the belly dancer, who with her words and deeds, left an everlasting impression of love in me........................
to the belly dancer, who sow the seeds of passion and compassion in me.......
to the belly dancer, who liked my touch and adored my kiss.....................

to my belly dancer.............................. I LOVE U & I always will!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!